pain used to be the one thing that told miche that she was alive and she was still able to feel. anger was the other thing that told her that she is still able to be a human. but the pain has become so great that staying alive is now a chore, a struggle, a pain in and of itself. and the anger she feels has become guilt. between the pain and the guilt miche no longer knows which is worse.

miche thought that only in her madness death was such a temptation. now that the madness has passed for the day, miche realises that she does not deserve to be alive. sorry.


i can feel life, emotions and feelings draining themselves out of me. i looked into the mirror and realised that i am nothing more than an empty shell, a walking vessel with nothing in it. i find myself talking to the one thing yo left behind, imagining that yo can actually hear what i am telling him. i once wrote that loneliness is an affliction, a disease and an addiction. now i know, that death may be its literal and metaphorical cure.