i told you a long time ago, be careful with me i am fragile in my head and in my heart. but when you decided that you were going to walk out on me without a word or explanation, you took away everything and broke whatever little that was left. now the pieces that lay around me are that of sadness and madness which alternates in its cycles and developments. it drives me up and down into weird, random and uncontrollable cycles of rage, wrath and crying. i hope you are happy now, because you dont want to care not that you cant. so watch me wont you, destroy myself and perhaps you in the process because you took away my soul and i have died inside. i dont care anymore. you have no idea what goes on in my head today and how happy i am thinking about the whole thing and how it makes me smile. maybe today i will be reduced to a slobbering crying mess again, who does nothing but stares into space into the darkness. the anger and rage in my head is so great that i need to hurt someone, dont worry, i wont hurt you, cause i promise that i would never do anything to harm you, but i cant promise anything else. why didnt you listen when i told you to be care with me, because i was fragile in my head and in my heart. why didnt you just listen for once. told you if you went, so would my sanity. so watch me now. watch the show.

really, suddenly being alive is no longer enough for anything or anyone. because the pain which once told me i was alive has now become the reason for me to die.